My life is like a story book.

And I can imagine how it is gonna make it to best-sellers series... Does anyone agree that their life is also a story?

I could never have felt so entangled in the heart. Something is strangling me in my heart, it really hurts.. From the time I have made a great friend, into getting ignored by the same guy for quite a while... From a young screw-up coward into a person who is not afraid of ball-to-the-face anymore, and now he loves basketball... From once when he met a group of guys, thinking that they were all intelligent in many things, include gaming, into becoming weekend cronies... From first seeing this pretty girl, tried joking a bit with her, seeing her laugh and stuff...

I probably cannot finish a fucking long story in one post, so I shall arrange the story based on my personal thoughts and troubles if any.

I shall start with two today: namely the great feeling of bonding with friends socially, and how love has troubled me...

Just now, playing basketball with friends have overcome much of my ball-to-the-face trauma. I didn't really get hit by the ball, however, just improved on ball handling and lay-ups. With two- no, three friends. Meng Ern, Terran, then Terence. We played basketball just as how others would normally do, laughed at each others' jokes, encouraged one another in our skills. I can admit here that this feeling, well... The social community is more welcoming than how I viewed it...

But now, my troubles... I cannot describe it fully, but hope someone can visualize it. It feels like something is around my heart. It feels heavy, and weird. My mind feels threatened by jealousy of love, or something else of love...? I feel this pain, I feel like crying... Why?! I really can't take it much longer. Telling me to fight this strong emotion alone with my own willpower and mind power... Please, someone help me overcome this fucking painful feeling.. Though I must admit I already know the base reason why...