Envy Eventually Leads To Hatred

  Sometimes I don't understand the society and human nature. Literature lessons in school always critiqued about the society, hence the need for insight in our essays in order to ace the subject. Even CH Literature required that... I am a literature student trained to gain a philosophical insight with sensitive understanding of the world and then bring up a critic about it... Looks like this is time I apply what I learned from school as a skill and bring it up in this blog.

  I ain't really badmouthing anyone, you see... Just a general statement. When people notice someone else is better than them in a certain content, like job as a waiter for instance, they tend to get jealous and go into foul extents of trying to get ahead and even better through authoritative or crooked sabotages to cripple their "rival".    When they do so... What do they stand to gain? Doesn't that just cripple the performance of the entire team?

  I might sound like someone trying to be a smart-ass in the first two paragraphs, but actually I typed all this in a slight moment of disappointment with my seniors and colleague in work. How can I surprise you all again? Hmm... What if I say that my moment of joy warped into frustration in this job? Perhaps I did my part too well that my co-workers became jealous of me and decided to boss me around using threats of authority? I found it rather stupid, that I was made only to frigging serve tea and clean the table, whereas some bitch who was basically sloppy in everything and inexperienced gets a 'promotion'. They wanted to treat her like a carton full of pure gold and me as a rotting leather sack of mud. The seniors were also biased too. I merely followed orders by patrolling one section of the restaurant, since a senior told me to do so. She also told me only to patrol that particular section and nowhere else. Fine... I did. After three hours and a half, what do I get in return? More complains... More nags for me not being responsible and patrol the entire restaurant. Worse still, it was the same old senior who nagged at me.

  God... If only my friends could work with me as a team, instead of some biased simpletons with no teamwork and only one eye... They have indeed reduced me from one eager to gain more experience to a mercenary who  should work only with money in mind. It seems that their plans out of jealousy has brought snowfalls in the company's earnings. On the first day of my work, the company was able to earn a total of $7000+. Then on the following days, when I learned more things and commands and was open to more stations, the earnings increased to a lot more. Until the day I was treated like a bitch, their earnings fell to $5000+...

  Envy only leads to hatred, which is basically useless in everything, except in times of war. Why can't we just learn from the Mozi, that universal love is righteous? I certainly hope that it is only my seniors and that blur colleague of mine, and no one else in this world, who are capable of one-sided hatred and crooked intentions that could lead to their eventual downfalls... I have also decided to quit this job in January 2012 and pursue education in a Junior College, or simply quit this job in mid-February 2012 and start socializing with my friends and play basketball with them, and in some occasions hang out with my childhood friends when the time comes...

Independent, Or Headstrong?

Sometimes I really wonder whether people find me independent, or just plain headstrong. I don't even see the quality for me to attempt leadership, let alone the opportunity. Now that I recalled, the instructor in this leadership workshop once mentioned "interdependence" is the key to leadership. Is leadership a chest with many keyholes locking it? Does it require so many "keys" to open it? I can remember how many people became frustrated and just said, "Ah, fuck this shit!" and gave up. That also included the prefects, resulting in poor, and biased, leadership in my school. Even the excos(short for "Ex-Committees") merely hungered for the benefits of their positions; how it could improve their aggregate-scores and allow them an advantage to entering their desired courses. What about me? I remember a really funny-toned question from one of my friends, although his question was a fusion of sarcasm and disappointment, "What have become of you, Alvin?"

I'm not so naive as not to understand him, okay? He was actually surprised on how I deviated from the school's 'Norm'. You see... The 'Norm' of my school actually refer to people who care for themselves and should give up as they know the best for themselves. As such, my school was populated mainly of youths without self-principles. Anyways, the school was partially at fault for the lack of principles in their students: they select people based on their personal preferences, not on the students' talents or determination. I regretted, but deeply abhorred, the school's foundations, and myself for not taking the initiative because puberty had robbed me of my pro-activeness which sprouted in my childhood. It is too late, though... But! But I still see a chance next year. I see an opportunity to partake leadership next year. I see an opportunity to step up and let the world see what I am capable of!

I've given my statement. So... Is it independence, or headstrong? Lemme share with you guys something: See the purple dragon at the top of this blog? There exists three forms of him: one original, one legend, and a re-remake. I'll just leave out the re-remake, since it looks and feels more like a goblin than a dragon. His original self was headstrong and determined, whereas his legend self was independent and benevolent. Which do you think is better?